I was 7 years old when I was separated from my family in Jharang village of Dhading district. My other family members say that I came dancing to the Kathmandu but I didn’t know what fate beholden for me there.
I was kept in the church run orphanage. When I came to the orphanage, I was new to the language, city and everything. I didn’t know how to communicate with others in Nepali language, all I knew was my own mother tongue and few friends who came along with me to the orphanage. I was a shy girl, I didn’t want to open with others easily as now. When the volunteers came to meet us in the orphanage, I didn’t even go near them for I feared them. They had white skin with blue eyes and blond hair. By seeing them, my reaction was a kinda fearful. But other children knew who they were and used to play with the foreigners. The volunteers used to give candies, toys and balloons, I also remember they used our photographs.
When I was 7 years old, all I can remember was 3 people they were Prabhat (my brother), Nirmaya,(my mother) and Kalpana (my sister), when I was in the orphanage, Kalpana was the only person I knew. There was also often pea children from my village. I remember that we tried to escape that orphanage, we tried many times but failed every time. I also remember that I cried a lot when my mother didn’t show up to meet me at the orphanage because kalpana’s mother came often to meet her. Whenever she came from the village, I use to ask whether my mother has come too or not, everytime I got the answer no. Living in that orphanage was hell. The seniors in that orphanage knew how to please the wardens. They pretend to love them and care for them. For those who didn’t pretend to love the wardens were neglected and left behind. The children that were ill treated. The food which was given was never good and the hygiene, they were always slurry. The main person there had kept us because we were the source of income generation for them, the volunteers paid them a huge amount. We were like the centre of attraction. How badly I wished to be with my mother when I was far from her, and brother, how badly I wished to be free from that orphanage.
After 1 year being in that orphanage, I was again shifted to another. There was only 6 girls in the beginning but gradually the number increases to 10, 12 and 21. I was trying to open up with the girls because they behold the stories as I do. When I was to be happy the warden (female) came along with other seniors. I feared again for once that they were here to steal my happiness. When I saw the foreigners in the orphanage, I was no longer shocked for they were also like the ones who came to see us in the previous orphanage but my reaction was kind of dull. I didn’t know how to react for I didn’t fear them nor I was shy. The foreigners were with us for six months. But the truth was that, they never were with us during our necessity times. They never were there during our sick times. I still urged to be with my mother and brother. Every night, I prayed to God to be with my own family. But I felt my prayers were never heard and being answered by God. When other girls talked about foreigners being their family, I also assumed them to be my other family. Little did I know that families are meant to be together in every situation, during our sick times. Like the previous orphanage, we were not treated good. This time the people working in the orphanage pretend to treat us before the eyes of the foreigners.
The year 2012 proved to be in my favour for I was reunited with my own family after a long time. I saw my father for the second time. For I had met with him when I was in class 3 for the first time. To be honest I didn’t recognize him when I saw him .
When I was living in the orphanage, we were forced to dance and sing to make the foreigners happy. We were given nice foods and clothes when the foreigners were around. But once they were gone, the people working there revealed their true identity.
Volunteering in orphanages breaks hearts of children living there. Who will repair those pains?
hands. Come and get your children back.’ The rest is history.
Children belong in families. Not orphanages. Find out how you can be part of the solution.